did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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