i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
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My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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