It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize