The maid of honor just puked.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize