Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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