U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize