Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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