So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
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