so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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