how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize