so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
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I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
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When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
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