oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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