my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
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Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
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30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize