Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize