My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize