last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
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It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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