Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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