i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
