she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize