How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize