Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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