he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
My cat gives me a boner
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
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Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
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Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize