she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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