Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize