I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
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don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
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The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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