I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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