The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
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