16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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