i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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