I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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