dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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