I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
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