Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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