Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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