Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize