i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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