Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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