This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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