Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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