My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
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