just come out here and I will go home with you...
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize