We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize