I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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