I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize