No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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