Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
And then my night got REAL pukey
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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