The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize