Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize