i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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