Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
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She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
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Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
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